Haus christmas

The Haus is the home of the Samwell Men's Hockey Team. It is #151[1] Jason St[2], along with the fraternities and across from the Lacrosse frat[3].

History Edit

The Haus was built in 1985 and is only saved from being condemned by Shitty's unusual understanding of property law and its loopholes[4]. It is unclear who actually owns the Haus or what will happen to it after Shitty graduates.[5][6][7]

The home was previously a sorority house, until two sisters (Jenny and Mandy) were trampled in a rush event gone wrong. They may or may not live in the attic and may or may not haunt Ransom, depending on whether or not you believe in ghosts[8].

The Haus kitchen, at the beginning of the story, contains nothing but a cabinet full of sriracha, a lot of empty Keystone cans, and a temperamental oven. Eric Bittle names the oven Betsy and takes over the space for his baking[9]. When William Poindexter arrives, he takes over fixing the oven[10][11]. For Bitty's 20th birthday (May 6, 2015), Jack Zimmermann dips into his NHL signing bonus to buy a new oven for the Haus[12].

The part of the roof that overhangs the porch is known as the Reading Room, and Shitty often sits out there.[13] The Haus contains a battered and stained green couch that Bitty has sworn to get rid of before he graduates.[14]

The Haus is generally understood to be shambolic and in need of lots of work. It might be infested with wild animals,[15] has power problems, leaky pipes and holes in the walls.[16]

By the spring semester of 2016, the dryer is going and according to William Poindexter, can barely do a pair of socks anymore. Dex begins attempting to get the money to replace the dryer from the fines coming from the romantic relationship between Eric Bittle and Jack Zimmermann.[17]

Samwell Hockey Bylaws Edit

These are frequently referred to, but infrequently detailed. The Bylaws were written on the wall in the basement of the Haus behind the water heater by Shitty in Fall 2011 (when he and Jack were freshmen.)[18]

Bylaw #1 is that players must always have their bro's back[19]. They also specify that the frog (first-year player) who gets the first point of the season will do the season's first official kegster[20] and get shitfaced.[18] This may be bylaw number four or nine.[18] Number thirteen simply states, "Ffffuck the LAX team!!!"[18]

Residency in the Haus is determined by "dibs", in which graduating seniors directly give their rooms to other players, or allow occupancy based on a lottery.[21] A handshake is key to bestowing dibs, and once a player lives in the Haus, he has rights to that room until he graduates.[21] If there is an argument about who gets a room, a "dib flip", or flipping a coin can be used to decide between multiple parties instead of a lottery. If the coin lands without a side facing up, the room will be shared by both parties.[22]

Events Edit

The Haus is often mentioned as a venue for parties and gatherings.

At the end of fall semester in Bitty's sophomore year, Holster and Ransom decide to throw a huge kegster, inviting 1,000 people on Facebook,[23] for which they create a spreadsheet[24] and name the party "EpiKegster."[25] Bitty then documents various overheard conversations on campus about the party.[26][27][28] Shitty and Lardo use the bathtub to brew punch,[29] and make the frogs do all the chores in preparation.[30][31] After guests begin to arrive[32], Bitty spends time talking to Jack to keep him from appearing awkward.[33] Kent Parson shows up and Bitty takes a photo with him, as does Ransom.[34] In the aftermath the next morning, Shitty clears the Haus using an airhorn and a megaphone.[35] During the party, Kent apparently tries to rekindle his former romantic relationship with Jack Zimmermann but is rejected. His response to this draws him the permanent ire of Eric Bittle.[36][37]

Due to an intense game of Settlers of Catan between Jack and Holster,[38] most board games are banned in the Haus.[39]

Further Resources Edit

References Edit

  1. Year 2 Comic 8
  9. Comic #4
  10. Year 2, Comic #5
  17. Year 3, Comic 13
  18. 18.0 18.1 18.2 18.3 Year 3 Comic 2
  20. Comic #7
  21. 21.0 21.1 Comic #23
  22. Year 3, Comic 17
  36. Year 2, Comic 9
  37. Year 3, Comic 7

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